Legitimate What?

There's a lot of talk today about something called, "legitimate rape," so I've been trying to wrap my head around it.

It sounds like one of those oxymorons, like jumbo shrimp or living death.

Since rape is illegal, in all cases, I don't see how it could ever be "legitimate" in any case.

I'm just going to come out and say that, rather than being an oxymoronic term, "legitimate rape" is just a moronic term.

In addition, I'll offer my own definition of rape.  If she (or he) doesn't want to, or isn't old or able enough to give consent, it's rape.  Any form of force, and it's rape.  And anyone who gets a "yes" using power, threats, coercion, bribes, fear, authority, or manipulation to get their way with someone is guilty, too.  Period.

It's true that there are plenty of [people] who don't get it.  You know what kind of [people] I mean.  [People] who don't view women as people, as intelligent individuals capable of knowing their own minds.  Who think women are only here on earth to be used by them.

Like the guy who kept saying to me, "You're so cute--why won't you go out with me?"  He was completely missing the part of his brain that would have told him that I would have to think he was cute to want to go out with him.

Or the coworker who asked me out over and over, only to receive clearer and clearer refusals.  Actually, the first one: "No, thanks," should have been clear enough.  Finally, I said, "Look.  I don't want to go out with you.  How can I be clearer?" 

"That's pretty clear," he said.  "I just keep hoping you'll change your mind."

Because, of course!  I can't know what I really mean or really want.  In their minds, it's just not possible for anyone to NOT want one of these Neanderthals.

Or the guy who got in trouble for harassing me, only to plead later, "I don't understand why we can't be friends!"

"Because I admire my friends," I said.  He didn't get it.

And don't get me started on the superhero ability someone thinks women's bodies have of "shutting down" conception as an act of will.  I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt that every time I tried to get my husband pregnant, it backfired.

It would be wonderful if we could just decide whether or not to get pregnant.  I did choose to have each of my seven children--and would again, but just think--if this was something women could control mentally, there would be no need at all for contraception, adoption, infertility treatment, or probably several other terms that are a necessary part of the world we live in.

In my opinion, there's already no room for moronic terms, and no room in positions of power for those who coin them.