Once upon a Time, I Had a Little Girl

Once upon a time, I had a little girl.  She was a very nice little girl.  She didn't always want one of everything imaginable.  For example, she would blurt out, "That's too tasty!" when we tried to give her some dinner.

Well, a few years have passed, and she wants everything imaginable.  At least, she wants some things that I never imagined her wanting. 

And, she's bigger than me now. And, this is the clincher, sometimes has her own money.

Today, she was full of surprises--for me.  Not surprises I wanted.  That's next week.

First, she mentioned that there was a concert she wanted to attend.  A symphony.  Tonight.  And she could get a student ticket, cheap. 

Well, of course, I'm all for my daughter attending the symphony and having cheap tickets and all. I just didn't think of it ahead of her.  It's a mother's job to anticipate their children's needs and wants, and I've been doing that for a good many years. So, it surprised me.  It's a little unnerving to have her ahead of me all the time lately.

"Who are you planning to go with?" I asked, wondering if I really wanted that whole answer.

"You or Dad, I guess," she said.  Well, now, that was nice.  Personally, I am too volatile of a cougher today to attend a symphony, but I thought maybe we could figure out a way her dad could go with her.  Not that he could get a student ticket, cheap. 

She and her dad looked into it.  Her ticket would be fifty percent more than she anticipated, for a same-day performance.  And her dad's?  Well, more than 200 percent more than that.  Still, we were willing to consider it.  It's not easy for her to give up on something she's thought of that she wants. It's even harder for her dad to do it.  And it's 200 percent harder for him to give up something he thinks she wants.  So, I coughed my way through that conversation.

Then, I found out, she wanted to go spend time with her friend.  This wasn't too much of a surprise, but she did just announce the time to me without a lot of notice: "Three to four!"  Okay!

I must admit that this girl spent a couple hours of her day cleaning up my kitchen.  And I mean, up on a chair washing the cupboards and blinds kind of cleaning.  "Thank you!" I said, and, "What a doll!"  I even happened upon her with her head in the oven, cleaning it.  And, yes, that really was a surprise.  Of course, come to find out, all of this work was because she is planning a party next week.  In my kitchen.  With four friends.  Two of them boys.

She's always got plans I didn't anticipate for my computer, the household noise level, and my time.  (In fact--and I am not making this up--just as put the period on that sentence, she appeared in the doorway and asked, "Can I use your computer as soon as you're done?")

I was trying not to cough on clothes I was folding when she found me for the next surprise.  Just as if it were normal conversation for her (which it never has been), she informed me that she wanted to go to a certain place and have a certain haircut. 

I have always--sparingly--cut her hair in the past.  I have five sons, so I have spent my haircutting money on them, not her.  I offered to trim it for her.  She gazed back at me unfazed.  I offered to try to layer it a little.  The unfazed gaze again. "I want bangs like this," she said, clinching it.  I can cut bangs--though I never have on her--but I could probably not be relied on to cut bangs exactly "like this," and we both knew it.  She reminded me she has her own money.

In a weak last attempt, I cautioned, "You'll regret it."  I'm not unfair.  I explained what I meant by that.  That bangs "like that" would constantly be in her face and would take at least a year to grow out to the length she keeps her hair.  Of course, I hadn't thought that through very well, because, typically, when a parent offers advice to a teenager, it's pretty likely that she has just solidified the opposite result.

So, my daughter went off to have her first professional haircut.  And pay for it herself.  She's a very good girl, and she wanted a very reasonable cut.  She wasn't talking about a half-shaved head or hot pink hair, so it was right for her to do what she wanted with it.  In fact, my daughter is such an excellent girl that she did think about--and put off--the bangs part.

She returned from her friends' house to announce that they had walked from there to some unplanned location to film something for their school project (school projects just are NOT what they used to be) and saw some older kids who used to go to their school, so they involved these older kids in their conversation, film, and project.  "Can my friend walk home with me," she asked, at another time in the near future, so they could go to another business location to include THAT in their school project?

Cough, cough! 

At least she asks.  Except, of course, when she forgets.

I know it's her job to grow up faster than I can think about it, but I finally did have to ask her to hold any more surprises for a day when I'm not grinding to a dead halt.